Random (humorous) Thought: The Gov’t, Weapons, Caskets, Aliens and 2012

I’ve been seeing a lot of posts lately about how government spending is out of control, and I agree. People are also pointing out the ridiculousness of what the government is buying and, again, I agree. Everyone is freaking out over the US Government’s homeland departments (DHS, FEMA, etc) buying tons of guns, ammo, riot gear, caskets, and armored vehicles. What I don’t agree on is what or why the government is buying this stuff for. 

Many people who buy into conspiracy theories think that the government, a.k.a. the Globalists a.k.a. the Illuminati a.k.a.the Satanic Bankers, are out to kill us all. Let’s set aside the ridiculousness of power hungry sociopaths killing off the very people which they wish to enslave and how ridiculous that idea is (unless they are going to bring us all back as zombie-salves!) and let’s pretend that there is no conspiracy. Trust me, Obama and his Goldman Sachs army don’t want to kill you. They need you and they especially need your tax dollars. 

Maybe there’s other logical theories as to why gov’t is buying and stocking up on so much equipment and weapons right now. There’s the crazy theory that maybe they are afraid of European Union level riots and protests. Maybe they have tasted the spoils of the military hand-me-downs and are sick of their low-powered arsenal and they all want to upgrade. Or maybe it’s the end of the fiscal year and all of the gov’t agencies need to use up the remainder of their budget so they don’t lose funding for the new fiscal year, especially with the rise in popularity among the population to make huge cuts in the federal defense budget (no way, this makes too much logical sense). Let’s pretend all of these reasonable and logical explanations don’t work either. 

So here’s my random thought: What if Obama and the Federal gov’t are buying all of this gear for our own protection? 

What would they possibly be preparing to protect us from? Well, here’s a few options:

1. World War 3. There are a lot of signs that we are on the path to an even larger war than most suspect. No, not Iran, but a war caused by our involvement in Iran. Israel just took a dry run, killing Sudanese citizens, to test their bombing capabilities. The US has been assassinating Iranian scientists and working with Mossad to implement Stuxnet viruses and sabotage Iranian nuclear plants. Guess who doesn’t like this, outside of Iran, obviously: China and Russia. Guess who has the most nukes and military capability outside of the United States: Russia and China. 

2. Alien Invasion. Maybe Paul Krugman was right?!?! Maybe the more money the Government spends on fighting the non existent aliens (or do they exist… dun dun DUNNN!) the faster we’ll get out of this global recession. That Krugman, he’s always ahead of the curve!

3. American Revolution 2.0. Think about it. We’re all angry. We’re all broke. We’re all unhappy. And the new Assassin’s Creed just came out and it’s centered around the American Revolution. 

And my personal favorite reason for the increased weaponization of homeland departments…

4. 2012 and the Mayan Prophecy. Maybe our gov’t believes the legitimacy of the Mayan Prophecy. If you don’t know what I’m talking about let me first thank you for being the only sane human on the planet. Okay, now that we’ve crowned you the smartest human alive, go watch this (or don’t, it won’t make a difference): 2012, End of the World. Outside of the fact that even the Mayan’s say that the end of their calendar doesn’t corresponds with the end of the world any more than  the end of our own annual calendar signifies the apocalypse. 

But maybe, just maybe, our gov’t likes to spend money on ridiculous things (you don’t say!) and maybe, just maybe a few of the crazies that run our government and defense industries believe in the Mayan Prophecy. And maybe, just maybe, our gov’t is gullible enough, stupid enough, inefficient enough, misguided enough and spend-happy enough that they are actually throwing a ton of resources at this just in case. Sort of how we built 10,000 nuclear bombs, you know, just in case we want to implode our entire planet into a black hole. 

All of this sounds crazy, but to me, it sounds crazy when people tell me that government, an establishment that relies on having vast numbers of enslaved citizens to supply it with continuous money, labor, and power, would want to kill off the only asset that they depend on. 

Your government doesn’t want to kill you, trust me. They need you, every single one of you. Without you, government has nothing. It’s a fictional character that, without people, doesn’t exist. What government wants to do is keep you alive and obedient for as long as humanly possible. 

All of the above is much more likely than some vast global conspiracy by the CIA, in conjunction with the United Nations, to raise, educate and nurture and then put in place two completely identical Presidential candidates, who are nothing more than life-like robots who are programmed to serve the Skull & Bones run Intelligence community and are armed with the order to murder of the entire planet, except for all of the CIA overlords  who will be hiding out at George Bush’s Colorado mountain-cave-lair. 

"Never ascribe to conspiracy that which is adequately explained by incompetence"